So, am sat at my computer in my more or less empty room. Jos is sitting on my bed eating peshwari naan bread. Everything I own is pretty much in boxes or bags. My room has been hoovered and dusted and honestly, doesn't really feel like the room I've stayed in the past two years. I've been so busy packing and tidying the flat that I've not really had time to sit down and feel anything. There seems to be a dullness, a sense of heaviness in the air and in my heart. I think it's only going to sink in when I actually leave St Andrews tomorrow morning. But yeah, this is it. This is the end of 4 fantastic, mind-blowing, life-changing years. Who knows what the future holds? I just want to take the chance to thank all of you loyal readers for bearing with me, for putting up with my incessant whining, bitching and being a virtual pain in the ass. I appreciate the time you've taken to read and empathize. I appreciate your concern and your comments most of all. You guys are the reason I continue to write my poetry. Right now, I'm tired and suffering from an alcohol overload (the jazz brunch at Broons was a boozy one...Jenny singing Jazz always does it for me!) and a lack of sleep. So, keep on keeping it together and reading and I'll let youse know where the wind takes me.
Peas Out,
Tim!!

Aidan loves it.

Aidan loves it.
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

This is Aidan, being splashed with water after his very last exam ever. This was taken earlier today and from the expressions on the faces of Aidan, Sara and Alasdair, you can tell that in St Andrews, water brings joy to everybody. Including yours truly. Ooooh...water......

Kristina on the Funny Couch.

CIMG3259
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

This photo was taken at silly o'clock last night, after me and Kristina had gone thru a bottle of cava. We were on the wine at this point in time. I woke up today without the ability to smile until I saw this photo and remembered what a brilliant night I had round at her's last night. And so, I've decided to put this photo up as a reminder of my marathon booze session in St Andrews. Hooray!

Cowboy Tim and Champagne Caroline

CIMG3250
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

This was taken in the midst of yesterday's marathon booze session in the Westport Beer Garden. I love Fi's Cowboy hat, I think it very fetching. I wish it was mine. Shortly after this photo was taken, I returned to my flat to cook Timbanara for Ali and Aidan and had an unfortunate incident with a cheese grater.

The United Colours of Benetton.

The United Colours of Benetton.
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

I love this photo of Sam,Alex and myself. This pretty much sums up the poem which went before this entry. Hope this photo brings you as much joy as it has me *grin*.

Poem of the Day:

Tea-Tripping

Drank some magical green tea,
Inside was a mushroom from Mexico.
An hour later,
Snoop and Pharrell told me to drop it like it's hot.
I watched the Simpsons,
I watched the world outside.
I watched the leaves on the trees dance from side to side.
I walked to Alex's garden on Greyfriars,
The colours of her flowers got brighter and brighter.
I sat in her gazebo with Sam and her,
Did a little jig to Mylo on Sam's Mobile,
Mylo told me that the MotherF**ker was gonna drop the pressure.
So, I took a butterfly net to West Sands and thought about going fishing.
Instead, I climbed the sand dunes,
And made up my own drum and bass tunes.
Forgetting myself, feeling like a child.
Ran on the beach like a man gone wild.
Hours later, brought gently back down to earth,
I consumed half a tub of ben n jerry's,
And watched a movie with Sean and Fi.
Needless to say, that night I slept like a baby.

Tim'05

Kitchen Life.

Kitchen Life.
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

During exam revision period, we don't look after our kitchen very well. In fact, the fruits get so lonely that they sprout faces and go speed-dating. That bloke smiling sweetly in the fruit bowl, that's Fred. An hour after this photo was taken, he was in apple heaven.

Tatt on the Beach, No More Exams, Ever!

Tatt on the Beach, No More Exams, Ever!
Originally uploaded by buggboy.

This is me after my last ever exam, Tattinger in hand, looking suitably windswept at Castlesands, my favourite beach. Shortly after this photo was taken, my face turned a beautiful shade of alcoholic pink and I knew that madam sobriety had long since left the building. Oooooh, Bubbly on the beach....I like.

Exams are over and I am done. Mon the boozing, the partying, the sleeping in, the lack of anything to do, the Neighbours-watching, the schmoking, the coffee-drinking, the sunshine, the summer and everything else bright and beautiful!!

And so, it has begun. The last ever week of mad exam revision. I have an exam this saturday and then another one next monday. There is simply not enough time to compress an entire semester's worth of work (for two modules) into my poor head!! I have been at the library the past two days, reading like a villain, talking to folk, using the computers, listening to my ipod, looking at the incredible amount of beautiful girls (all looking very intellectual with books and pens and paper), destroying my lungs every hour (on the hour!), trying to keep my sanity intact.....ahhh..in less than a week, I am going to be a very happy bunny. But for now, the reading continues....pleasepleaseplease, let me retain all this knowledge just for another week....that's all I ask for...then I can go crazy again...what keeps me going is the knowledge that this is the last ever set of exams I am going to have to sit for...MON the Real World! Or not....I wish I had a back up brain....it feels so full, so full of anthropology.....so full of Melanesia and Art......

Choonage: Bob Marley - Sun is Shining

Right, short update on the mental weekend.
Thursday night, too many beers, not enough food.
Friday afternoon, Hungover like no other.
Friday night, May Ball...AMAZING!!! Groove Armada were really good...MC Madd provided some proper MC-ing in his inimitable style, singing SuperStylin like his life depended on it...the bongo man was wicked too...
Alasdair and Don were sharp as ever on the decks...Beer and Loathing did a fantastic job in the foyer...
And my personal favourite..Lottie...ohmygawd....she was funky as hell and I am now a convert to the cult of Lottie....She is the epitome of House!!
And of course, somehow managing to get VIP access made my night that much easier....all that champagne, gin and tonics and vodka redbulls came together to make the May Ball one of the best nights I've had this year...and the fantastic company of Fede,Sam,Teresa and loads of other folk helped as well....the crazy,drunk girl who came up to me,grabbed me by the front of my shirt and shouted into my face that her "boyfriend was not happy with her, she wanted to salsa (to house music) and she thought i had the moves" was one of the funniest drunks I've met in a long time.
Saturday, rough as fark.....Uncle B made a surprise visit to St Andrews..having not seen him in more than 2 years, it was a very pleasant surprise indeed......we had a lovely meal at the Thai Restaurant and lots of nice wee drinks....today,i am feeling a bit out of sorts....and there's still the JBH first year reunion at TP's, as well as Ruth's birthday barbeque....I need to start studying for my exams!!!!!!!!!!Why all this crazy partying??!! Wish us luck!

The last ever essay (Describe and Discuss the role of 'Secrecy' in Two or More Oceanic Examples) has been handed in. I asked for my first and last extension for it. It was due on Tuesday but I felt so sick on Sunday (post-Coxy) that I knew that it wouldn't be in on time. Anyhow, it's done, it's in and now, I've got but 2 more exams to go and then I'm done with university, done with St Andrews. I felt almost sad to hand it in....then again, what a tremendous relief. I'm taking the rest of today off and I might (should) start revision tomorrow....my first exam is a week from Saturday..but tomorrow night, if all goes as planned, I will be at the St Andrews Charity May Ball (apparently the UK's biggest student-run ball), drinking like a fish (free flow of 'premium' drinks and food) and dancing to a plethora of student bands and big name djs like GROOVE ARMADA and Lottie...oh yes.....
It is going to be a massive massive night!! Bring on the May Ball!!!
On a final note, at yesterday's last ever class(i know,i know..eveything seems to be taking on a special significance in my last few weeks at uni), the guest lecturer spoke about blogs and how they represent so many different things...much of what he said made loads of sense and really made me think about this blog and how it's become such an (dare i say it?) important part of my everyday life....what started as an online diary for the randoms out there to read, has become something which constrains me and has so many boundaries that I dare not reveal everything that passes thru my thoughts...the poetry is as close as I get to speaking my mind but, apart frm that, I never really mention names for fear of being found out...have i turned into my blog? or has my blog turned into me? It's become such a part of my identity....my blogging persona, almost like my alter-ego, injected with bits and bobs of my true self, if there exists such a thing...it's almost like I have an identity, a reputation to uphold...a side of me which my audience expects everytime they log on....what Lynette said about my 2 themes (partying and the lack of love) have almost come to define who I am as the online diarist....surely, there must be more to me than just the two themes? Maybe tomorrow I'll write about the sleeping habits of ants and write a poem about shoe laces.
But for now, here's the:

Poem of the Day:

The sun is shining


The sun is shining,
Feels like I've not slept in days,
My nightmares,
Continue to
Plague my mind.
Waking up every morning to find,
That I'm still stuck in this shell,
This imperfectly formed excuse for a body.
The sun is shining.
And I'm thinking,
About going to the gym.
But decide instead,
To give in,
To:
My vices,
My wants.
My needs,
For booze,fags,caffeine and depression.
Don't I ever learn my lesson?
The sun is shining yet I'm feeling helpless,cold and empty.

Tim'05

Choonage: The Thrills - Old Friends, New Lovers

Poem of the Day:

All I want


I've had enough of talking,
And yes,I'm done with walking too.
No more small talk,
Let's just sit in silence.
I want to hold your hand and not just your attention.
I want to kiss you as well, did I forget to mention?
You're so damn beautiful,
And I'm such a fool,
For falling in love with you.
Everywhere we go,
All the boys look at you.
All the boys stare at me.
All the boys ever do,
Is succeed in making me paranoid.
I just want to be alone with you.
I just want to lose myself with you.
I just want to surprise myself,
By being myself,
In front of you.
Is that so hard to do?

Tim'05

Choonage: Untitled- Interpol